Back at the University of Richmond

Here I am back at the University of Richmond for the Art of Kissing show on February 10, 2010. Everyone was a delight to work with and the house was packed. There was standing room only. And the photographer was such a professional, check out the link above. (Photo: Leigh Donahue)

New Edition of The Art of Kissing

A cute new edition of The Art of Kissing is in stores now, just in time for Valentine's Day. This is the complete and unexpurgated text from the latest (second revised) edition of the book, originally published in 1991, revised in 1995, and issued in a second revised edition in 2005. This is that book, reformatted (and printed beautifully, in China) and now in a smaller size. Of course the book is written in English (even though it was printed in China). If I hadn't written it myself, I would still say it is the best book on kissing. I love it!

Why the Neck

The neck is a young man's Golden Gate Bridge. In plain and simple terms it is his highway to another world. When a girl throws her head back, say, if she's sitting on a sofa and you're kneeling at her side, you can trace the line of her neck up and down with your lips. Herodotus, the famed Greek historian, tells us that King Alexander the Great, when he was only eighteen years old, used this kissing technique on the neck of the Queen of Persia, who was 29 at the time. The queen had been a widow for three years and had vowed never to marry again. After a few minutes with Alexander and his neck kissing technique, she began to shiver and tremble, and a fine line of sweat formed on her forehead. She vowed to make the boy king hers, she fell so madly in love with his kissing style.

Why are you neglecting her neck? Like the Queen of Persia, she will love your neck kisses. I talk about neck kisses all the time but most guys don't pay much attention because neck kisses don't thrill them the way they affect women. But take it from Herodotus, the neck kiss will do the job, time and again.

How to do neck kisses like Alexander

1. Kneel at her side.
2. Run your lips up and down her neck.
3. Whisper words of love as you kiss. Phrases such as, "Oh, you vixen!" or "My, what lovely ears you have!" will suffice. But if you can recite a sonnet or even a few lines from Robert Burns or Shakespeare or any number of other poets, she'll faint, just as the Queen of Persia did.
4. Be careful with this one! You may have women falling in love with you.
   

Kissing Show

Here is some footage from a typical kissing show. The show is available at select colleges and universities, brought to you by your student activities board and kissing.com. The show is directed by William Cane, author of The Art of Kissing. It features students from your own campus doing thirty different romantic kisses onstage. A proven crowd pleaser. Booking through The Contemporary Issues Agency.

On the Road With the Kissing Show

I've been on the road the past two weeks with the kissing show. I had a lot of fun and made a few new friends; and I didn't have a single heckler in the house for nine straight performances. The kissing show is nicely described in this article about my appearance at the University of Richmond: Students Learn the Art of Kissing. I enjoy talking with reporters, and not simply because I get publicity from it: I actually enjoy meeting the creative people behind the stories. Journalism — and especially the New Journalism —is a big interest of mine. I really enjoyed the way Avril Lighty wrote her story, and I hope you do too. (Photo: William Cane standing in the audience while directing the kissing show. Photo by Lily Ackerman.)

How to End a Kissing Relationship

I received the following question from a woman in South Dakota. I include my reply, illustrating how to end a bad kissing relationship. Her question demonstrates how important kissing skills can be for making — or breaking — a relationship!

Q. I have been dating a man for a few weeks. We have been taking our time. Both in 40's with past experiences that helped me to decide to try something different (i.e. taking time, and continuing to pursue a man I was not initially attracted to). We kissed for the first time and I immediately felt I could not be with him. He was a bad kisser. How does one approach a person in telling them they do not want to pursue the relationship? I have thought I could say I was sad because I enjoy him in so many other ways but it was not there when we kissed. I guess I would want to tell him because I imagine he will continue dating others and for the sake of him and the others maybe knowing will help with his potentials. I would appreciate any advice.

A. In my opinion it is simply not a good idea to tell him you're ending the relationship because he's a bad kisser. In fact, in order to be polite (in an age in which civility and politeness may be somewhat of a lost art), simply taper things off and make some other excuse, such as: "I have decided not to pursue relationships at this time because . . . I am thinking of pursuing spiritual studies and prioritizing my philosophical and spiritual studies over everything else" (the way Larry did in Somerset Maugham's novel The Razor's Edge).

The reason I suggest that you do not tell him is also because it is always a good idea to keep on friendly terms with men you have previously dated, if you can. There are many reasons for this, not the least of which is there is always the possibility that he may inherit a million dollars or win the lottery and that he may then perhaps decide to take you on a friendly vacation to Paris or Rome or some other exotic place you've been hoping to see all your life. Or maybe you'll want to call him up with a question about something in the future. Or perhaps he can introduce you to one of his friends. . . You see, there are a million reasons why it's good to remain on pleasant and friendly terms with past lovers, if you can. But telling him he's a bad kisser would be an insult to his pride. He doesn't need lessons from you, and you have no obligation to tell him of his problem if you leave him (only if you decide to stay with him!).

So, the bottom line: My advice is not to tell him he's a bad kisser if you decide to stop the romantic relationship. Instead make up some other plausible reason, and keep him as a platonic friend or acquaintance.

Comcast Kissing Show

I'm delighted to report that you can now see the kissing show featured on Comcast, if you subscribe to Comcast cable television. To see the show, go to Comcast's "On Demand" service. Then scroll down to "more choices." Then scroll down to "The Cutting Edge." Finally select "The Art of Kissing." You'll see plenty of exciting romantic kisses demonstrated by students from The University of Delaware. You'll also receive some up to date kissing tips and a brief discussion about how I wrote the book The Art of Kissing and how I direct the kissing show. Enjoy!

First Kiss

Here's a video with first kiss comments made by a very talented young director, http://www.youtube.com/user/kokiriforest. Enjoy!

Comcast

My appearance on Comcast is expected to take place in December when I will appear on the network's "Singles Life" channel. The segments will feature some footage from a kissing show I recently did at the University of Delaware. It was a terrific experience. I was also working with my favorite associate, Brigitte Fontaine, who is my executive secretary. Her twin sister, Krissy Fontaine, our kissing support supervisor, was also in town, but she stayed in the hotel and would not come with us to do the filming. She was in a bad mood because her boyfriend, Dr. Harris Thornley, told her that her tongue is too short. Thornley, who is a good friend of mine, is forty-five years older than Krissy, but he's got a world of experience behind him and is a very sharp character. He looks like Norman Mailer and acts like him sometimes, too. Krissy was complaining about him the entire time she was in Delaware and her sister had to tell her to calm down. I looked at Krissy's tongue with a magnifying glass and told her it was not short. That made her feel better. She asked if she could test her tongue in any way, and I told her that if she could touch her chin with her tongue that would prove she had a long tongue. She promptly stuck out her tongue and touched her chin.

In the accompanying video (which is not my secretary or her sister) you can see a very talented girl who can do all sorts of tricks with her tongue. I posted this here to show you that your tongue has more flexibility than any other part of your body, and you should keep this in mind when French kissing. You can do all these motions, and more, with your tongue when kissing. Of course, this girl is genetically blessed because her tongue is even more flexible than most, but still your tongue can do a lot of different motions and movements. This video should be inspirational.

Kissing Flier

When I travel to colleges and universities to do a kissing show, I never can tell, in advance, exactly how the student demonstrators will react to the different skits and kisses they'll be doing onstage. Typically we have an audience of anywhere from 250 to a thousand in attendance, and the crowd usually finds the entire procedure vastly entertaining. I can show you something of what goes on in the show by pointing out a few things in the accompanying flyer. The top photo is me standing behind a couple. I am talking into the microphone explaining what the girl is thinking about while she's on a date. The next photo is an illustration of the neck kiss (from the DVD based on the book The Art of Kissing). Then you see me getting a good laugh from the crowd as I interact with the audience and ask them some questions about kissing. Next I'm demonstrating how to do a French kiss by going into a huge mouth onstage with two giant tongues, showing how the tongues flicker up and down. The next shot is from the DVD and illustrates excellent technique on the part of the boy, who is doing a neck kiss. The next photo is from a college show where a number of couples are kissing onstage simultaneously. The rest of the photos are self-explanatory, except for the large one in the middle, which illustrates how to kiss in a car. The girl has climbed onto her boyfriend's lap while he's driving and she's kissing him like mad. This gives you an idea what the kissing show is all about, but words can't fully describe it; in fact, they don't come close.

How To Make Kissing Romantic

A girl from Portugal writes in with this question: "How can I make my kissing more romantic? And how can I make myself a better kisser?"

A. There is only one way to make your kissing more romantic and that is to use your imagination. But, that being said, there are a thousand different things you could do once your imagination gets going. Just think what would be romantic for you. Usually this involves being together with the one you love, being close and communicating romantically. Togetherness involves privacy because if you're on a public street it's more difficult to focus on your partner. So think of places like a park, a beach at sunset, or — a cruise ship. Hey, the idea of an ocean cruise sounds romantic to me! If you can't get on a real cruise, well, you could talk about planning one with your partner. Anticipation is part of the fun.

Being close involves proximity. You want to be close enough to give him a playful punch on the arm or close enough, in other words, to touch. If you're this close you're either being very romantic or wrestling.

Communicating romantically means plenty of eye contact, maintaining a good sense of humor and smiling. Learn a few jokes and spring them on your lover when you're together. All these things will make your kisses romantic.

As to how to improve your kissing, my most concise advice (since my entire book The Art of Kissing is devoted to just this issue) is use variety. Don't just do French kisses. Try lip kisses, neck and ear kisses, sliding and upside-down kisses, lip-o-suction, biting kisses and any others your imagination can devise on the spur of the moment. In this way you'll expand your kissing abilities and have more fun too.

Motivation for Kissing

The sky is one of the greatest romantic backdrops, and kisses at sunset or under the moon or on a starry night have always been favorites with lovers. Well, get ready for something even better. Now when you go outside and look up into the sky, you can think about an asteroid that is headed for earth and which is on a near-collision course with us. The asteroid, named Apophis, was discovered in 2004, a tiny speck of light moving among the stars. NASA scientists calculated its orbit and found that it is scheduled to pass so close to the earth that it will be ten times closer than the moon, and lower than most communications satellites! The problem is that this prediction could be off by a few percentage points and that means the asteroid might actually hit earth. It is the size of a football field and would produce an impact equal to a hundred nuclear bombs exploding simultaneously. The scheduled impact date was originally calculated as Friday the 13th, 2029! But now the scientists predict the impact, if it occurs, will happen in 2036. Whatever the date of impact, and even if it's just a near miss, it certainly is food for thought,—and for kissing. Tell your girlfriend about Apophis, which is guaranteed to send chills down her spine. Then put your arms around her and draw her close for a romantic end-of-the-world kiss.

Reference

1. Link to Nova site with video on Apophis.